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After losing her daughter and grandson to a drunk driver, one woman transforms her grief into advocacy to prevent others from experiencing the same tragedy.
The world of Kathryn Warnken instantly turned upside down when a drunk driver took the lives of her beloved daughter and grandson in 2004. A 51-year-old intoxicated man, who Warnken wants to keep anonymous, already had a previous DUI conviction when he got behind the wheel and took the lives of 21 year-old Christina Gomez and 3 year-old Johnathan Kinder.
“Two lives were taken in an instant because of one man’s selfish decision,” said Warnken.
The man had been drinking at a restaurant near Christina’s home with his friends and refused to get a ride home. Christina and Johnathan were two miles from their home in Broward County when the man crashed into multiple cars before swerving into oncoming traffic to pass the cars in front of him. When he switched lanes, Christina and Johnathan were right in front of him.
Christina was killed instantly from a broken neck and Johnathan suffered a deadly head injury when the seat belt snapped from the impact. The driver was not wearing a seatbelt and was ejected through the windshield. He would later spend six weeks in an induced coma while law enforcement investigated what led up to the crash.
“The detectives told us that they did everything they could, but there was nothing that could have saved my daughter and grandson,” Warnken recalled in a somber tone.
The loss of Christina and Johnathan was unbearable for Warnken, affecting not only the grieving mother, but her loved ones as well. Christina’s younger brother, who was only 18 years-old at the time, received the devastating news alone.
“I was already at work at the time, so my son called my sister who worked in the same building because he was not capable of giving me the news and he did not want the detectives to tell me directly,” explained Warnken. “That’s a burden no young man should have to carry.”
The drunk driver was convicted and sentenced to 22.5 years in prison, 11.5 years for Christina’s life and 11 years for Johnathan’s life. However, the consequences of his choices extend beyond his life behind bars and the grief Warnken has to carry for the rest of her life. The drunk driver’s family also suffered the loss of their father and husband.
“His wife divorced him and his own immediate family lives in another state, so it’s difficult for them to travel to see him in jail,” said Warnken. “He has to live with the knowledge that he killed two precious kids.”
According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, about 37 people in the United States die in drunk-driving crashes everyday, one person every 39 minutes. In 2022, about 13,524 people died in alcohol-impaired driving traffic deaths.
“If I can make one DUI offender understand that their irresponsible actions have a ripple effect on so many others, then my kid’s death is not in vain,” she said.
For Warnken, the grief was uncontrollable for years after the accident. According to Cornerstone Healing Center, grieving the loss of a child is a pain that never fully heals. The deep sense of loss and despair does not easily fade after going through the tragedy of a child, sibling or parent dying before their time. After loss, some turn to PTSD or depression to numb the persistent sorrow, leading to a sense of darkness that persists over them.
“It took three years of professional help to get through the depression that sets in trying to cope with this type of loss,” Warnken admitted. “I pray for all those that have lost a child, but remember they will always be with us in our hearts and in our memory.”
Warnken found a calling by turning her loss into advocacy. She now speaks at law enforcement events and DUI classes to spread awareness about the effects of drunk driving so no other family endures the same pain.
“It took a while before I realized that my angels had left an important mission for me,” she said. “I had to help and be of service, not just to my family as I had until then.”
Every time she speaks at a DUI class, she recalls that she sees the faces of people who never thought they would end up there. Some feel remorseful and some are indifferent about their actions.
“But I always remind them that they have a choice- every drink, every drive, and every decision matters,” she said.
Her advocacy has brought her in contact with countless victims, each who carry their own burden of loss. This led Warnken to work alongside organizations like Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD), where she supports victims and pushes for stricter DUI laws.
She has witnessed the impact of her advocacy in the stories of those who have chosen sobriety and responsibility after hearing her speak. Some offenders have reached out to express their gratitude by acknowledging that her words have changed their perspective.
“Knowing that even one life might be saved because of my children’s story gives me the strength to keep going,” she said.
For Christina, Johnathan and other victims of drunk driving, she finds comfort in the work that she does. Warnken remains dedicated to her mission to prevent other families from experiencing the same anguish that she felt.
“I miss them everyday, but I know they would want me to keep going, to keep fighting, and to keep their memory alive,” she said. “My daughter and grandson may be gone, but their story continues to save lives.”
